Timothy is 11 months. ELEVEN!!!
I used to look at moms of other 11-month-olds as if they got the plague: they had that aura of having one foot back in the office (the matleave is a year-long thing here in Canada). And I didn’t like to think or be reminded of this.
And now I am one of those moms. I can almost see it in other moms’ eyes when they ask me how old Timothy is. One foot back in the office.
Anyway. Enough about me. That was just a preface on the topic of “how time flies”.
Timothy is 11 months.
He’s been such a happy boy these past few days since we got back from our xmas/new year’s trip! He’s all smiles and laughter – during the day. He crawls around, poking here, grabbing there, turning around, searching for me, meeting my eye, giving me the biggest smile or giggle… Knowing that soon I won’t be able to watch his every discovery saddens me. It’s inevitable – he won’t stay with me forever, regardless – and I am ready for this next chapter for us as a family, but still – it is very, very sad.
While he’s all smiles during the day, the last couple of nights were unusual for him. He cried almost nonstop this past night from 4 till 5 am. Nothing soothed him, not even nursing. He was crying right now, too. I kept running back and forth (knowing that he won’t fall asleep if I am continuously there… even if he is crying, I need to shoosh and stroke him – and leave the room and hope he’ll quiet down. If I remain in his room, he just keep crying). He finally quieted down after advil and nursing – and is now babbling in his crib quite contentedly. He hasn’t nursed at this hour for months. Teething? Growth spurt? Or perhaps he’s feeling my separation anxiety?
Anyway. Back to the happy thoughts.
He is an adept crawler now. He bangs his palms with such a force I feel he just might break the floor panels 🙂 He now has bruises on his knees from crawling.
He loves standing. He pulls up against the couch, the coffee table, the walls, the toys… even something as “flat” as my legs – he gets into a sort of a downward facing dog position, pushes – and voila! Stands! And applauds himself, proudly 🙂
He feeds himself with his fingers quite well – he likes raspberries, even though he squishes them sometimes too hard. He also loves pieces of bread which I give him with yogurt (he finally started eating yogurt!)
He had his second haircut 2 weeks ago – the bangs had been in his eyes, again.
He understands certain things. If I say “eat” and he has a soother in his mouth – he drops it immediately. Sometimes he would even start crawling towards kitchen. If I crouch, stretch my arms and call him – sometimes he crawls towards me, although he always overestimates when to stop and stops a couple of feet short 🙂 Today I asked and signed if he wants to read a book – and he turned and pointed at the shelf with all his books and even crawled there and fished a book. Amazing.
Part of me thinks I am not enough to keep him entertained, educated, developed all day long – he will be better off in a daycare, with other kids and professionals whose calling (hopefully) it is to play and teach and develop kids. Part (a small part that wasn’t there before) suggests that I just might want to stay at home indefinitely with him. I don’t quite trust this part, I think it’s just the anxiety… but it’s there.
We’ll see how things go…
Anyway, happy 11 months, my baby. I love you. And I will make you happy – we’ll just have to figure out what works for us all, right?..